30.12.10

last post.

Heyall! Wassup? LOL :p
Hm. I just wanna say, now i'm on my holiday. Yea, the year end holiday. And i'm totally bored here!
Actually, i just wanna post sumtin' in this December for closing 2010, but i don't know what to tell
Uhm, this December, a great month to end the 2010. Many things happened, and it all just a quite good way to end this year.

So, this is my last post in 2010
And i wanna tell u that, 'till now.. everythings going so well
At least, i thought so :)
I'll update my post as soon as possible. See u in 2011. So enjoy ur holiday and Happy New Year for y'all!
Bye ;)

18.11.10

First Love...?

*Actually.. this is a random post. And this post based from several posts in some websites, based from some articles, and of course.. based from my own experience :p


What's first love? Umm.. guess everyone has their own opinion about their first love..
Buat gue, cinta pertama itu sesuatu yang dirasakan untuk pertama kali(tentu aja-_-) dan untuk terakhir kalinya. Ga ada rasa yang bakal sama kayak rasa cinta pertama. Ga bakal ada kenangan yang bisa gantiin kenangan cinta pertama. Beribu pengganti yang kita cari, beribu kali kita mulai hubungan baru.. cinta pertama tetap sesuatu yang paling berpengaruh di hidup kita. 

"The magic of first love is our ignorance that it could ever end"

Yup, some people say that the first love would never end. Cause once we've entered it.. there's no way back. Cinta pertama.. Rasa cinta untuk pertama kalinya. Pertama kali kita belajar mencintai & dicintai. Pertama kali kita melakukan semuanya sebisa mungkin untuk orang lain. Pertama kali kita mengalami sesuatu yang terlalu indah di hidup kita. Pertama kali kita tahu bahwa hidup ini jauh dari yang kita bayangkan.. Rasanya seperti masuk ke dunia baru yang begitu rumit namun begitu......indah. Bagaimana mungkin kita bisa berhenti? :S

"Menurut para ilmuwan, cinta pertama yang sudah tertanam tak bisa dihapuskan dari ingatan. Kenangan cinta pertama bisa membuat orang yang mengalami ketagihan lebih kuat dibandingkan narkoba jenis apa pun" (Sumber: http://nasional.kompas.com/read/2008/06/06/15251450/kekuatan.cinta.pertama)

"The first time you fall in love, it changes you forever and no matter how hard you try, that feeling just never goes away" -Nicholas Sparks
Hmm kinda agree with that quotes. Love can change a person forever. Love that something that can't be denied.

Just for example, inget saat kita masih tk? Saat kita belom mengenal apa itu cinta.. hal apa yang bisa bikin kita nangis? hal apa yang bisa bikin kita merasa tersakiti? dan berapa lama rasa sakit itu bertahan? Mungkin pas kita masih kecil, rasa sakit karena jatuh dari tangga yang paling bisa bikin kita nangis paling kenceng. Namun rasa sakit itu bisa hilang hanya dalam waktu beberapa jam/hari.
Tapi ingat saat kita pertama kali menangis karena cinta? seberapa dalam rasa sakitnya? dan berapa lama rasa sakit itu bertahan? Pasti jauh lebih dalam dan lebih lama dari sekedar jatuh dari tangga kan? :/

Rasa sakit karena cinta sangat susah untuk diobati.

"When you are in love and you get hurt, it's like a cut.. it will heal, but there will always be a scar"
Apalagi rasa sakit karena cinta untuk pertama kalinya, coba aja lupain sekeras mungkin.. itu sama aja mengingat sesuatu yang gak pernah kita ketahui. It's like.. impossible. Kesan pertama ga mungkin bisa dilupain..
Sekarang coba aja kalian jatoh dari tangga, apa rasa sakitnya masih sama kayak waktu masih kecil? tentu nggak.. itu artinya kalian udah berubah semenjak mengenal cinta. Karena kalian udah ngerasain rasa yang jauh lebih sakit dari sekedar jatuh dari tangga..

"First romance, first love.. is something so special to all of us. Both emotionally and physically. That it touches our lives and enriches them forever" -Rosemary Rogers

And for me isn't it so beautiful if the first love is also the last love? ( just like my mom and dad :* )

And now, for the first love that has ended.. there's nothing we can do.
Don't try to replace your first love, or try to forget every memories between you and your first love.. it's only hurt yourself. Those memories were not to be forgotten, just to be remembered.. 
Just, keep on with your life. Even first love is something that maybe would never end, it's not a reason to stop your step and keep looking back. The past is the past 
And eventhough i really love my past, and my first love. I won't go back.. there's no point returning to the past while you still have a long great future ;)





10.9.10

Ramadhan 2010

Helloww! i'm back! :D
First i wanna say.. Selamat hari raya idul fitri 1431 H ya semuanyaaa!! Alhamdulillah, taun ini masih bisa merasakan berkah Ramadhan. Semoga puasa dan amal ibadah kita di bulan Ramadhan taun ini di ridhoi dan taun  depan masih diberikan nikmat Ramadhan lagi yaa..
Hmm seperti biasanya.. di bulan Ramadhan acara yang paling ditunggu tunggu itu acara bukber bareng temen temen gitu kan, dan kayaknya taun ini gue cukup sering bukber di luar nih hee ._.


Ok. I won't talk too much.. but i'm just going to download some photos of me and my fwens in this Ramadhan :)


Bukber 9A#16
(at Dana's)




Bukber&SOTR Saveriouz!
(Best event for me c:)




Bukber S16NATEND!
(At Rani's)


I only have a few photos for this event, cause the other photos haven't uploaded yet :/


Hmm.. sebenernya masih ada acara bukber yang lainnya sih. Ada acara bukber/peper bareng anak saman patra011012013 gituu tapi ga ada fotonya hehehe. Terus ada juga bukber bareng temen SD Albin#05, kayaknya belom di upload nih fotonyaT_T. Yang jelas, bulan ini seru kok seru walaupun di awal bulan gue udah ketemu banyak cobaan, banyak godaan, tapi banyak ketemu temen temen juga dan banyak rejeki ahaha.. walaupun suasananya agak beda dan ga kerasa kayak taun lalu tapi ya Alhamdulillah masih bisa puasa lagi tahun ini hehe.

Ok. Cukup sekian dan terima kasih.. ngantuk coy haha see u later!

oh btw, i just changed my blog templates and my blog title, hope u like it :p

bye.xoxo :*

11.8.10

it hurts..too much

hello! i'm back :)
and this time, guess what i'll tell you about?
yeah.... about him (again). It's been 2 months, and it hasn't stopped
It's like there's no end of stories about him. Get bored? woah.. try to be me. I've been bored enough to feel this pain
So sorry if you get bored with my story, i just don't know where i should tell all this things.. it hurts so bad


So.... i don't know what to say actually. Essentially, now he's found a new one and finally made his decision
And i don't know what to feel. And i don't know what to do
I don't know what actuallly happened
Cause everythings happened undercontrol, and i just have to accepted no matter what
and it hurts
I just feel so stupid right now
Feel so stupid for keep suffer in the same thing
Feel so stupid for keep crying for the same thing everynight
Feel so stupid for keep remembering the thing that won't happen again
Feel so stupid i keep do all those things, when he's already found someone else
Feel like an idiot and it hurts
Now it made me wonder.. What else will happen tomorrow? How long should i feel this pain?
I'm just afraid of tomorrow, when i have to face things that i never even wanted to know
yeah.. Reality hurts


Yeah..
IT HURTS TOO MUCH.. and now i'm numb

31.7.10

2 weeks

what's up with the title? yeah 2 weeks.. it's the period that i've spent in senior high school so far
It's been 2 weeks and... hhhh i don't know what to say
I love my new school, but i still love my old school better
It's my new class after 3 years, finally i have to join a new class and leaving my little family :(
First, i though it would be alright.. i know it would happen, and i always tell my self that come one, everything changes.. meet new peoples is not bad at all
Yeah, my new class is fine.. i love it. But there's just some differences that i have to faced.
And i'm not really ready with those differences

I know that this will not last forever, but kept telling myself that everything will be better .. just makes me tired
Every day, when I felt very uncomfortable and lonely. I believe in myself, that everything will be alright soon.
But every day also, when I think about it .. at the same time I am just afraid that all these things will never get better

The hardest thing to do is, hold your self from being your self
Feels like i wanna laugh so loud like i used to, but i can't.. it feels so strange
Feels like i wanna do whatever i want with my friends, but i can't
I just haven't meet anybody like my old friends, and now i'm kinda feel so lonely

Okay, maybe this all just need some process
But, how long the process
Nobody knows :(