A story of a...bestfriend?

I still remember the day when we first met. That day I never thought that we would be this close :)

Then time goes by..

So, that day

You've become my friend.. my closest friend.. my bestfriend

I still remember the days we spent time talking about each other

We sat together in the class, we listened to the song together

We shared everything

We've made ​​ourselves comfortable with eachother

Every time I feel tired, bored or even hurted

I could just greet you and tell you everything

Because I know you would understand and would make things better

Everything was going well until we've lost our minds.

Actually, that's kinda funny.

I still remember that day when you said you love someone

And usually, you tell me everything

But that day you said you couldn't t tell me who it was

At that time. You're lonely, and so was I. 

We need someone beside us

And we couldn't stop everything from fallin'

We have fallen in love with our bestfriend

Remember that day? when we knew we felt the same feelings 

That day we lied to ourselves. (Haha I laugh and cry at the same time if you think about it)

Until that night, When you said that .. You love me 

And I said the same thing 

Then we became lovers

Yes, That was a great time. A really lovely time 

We did everything together. We shared our school assignments

My school time, has became me so much fun when I was with you 

You're the reason, why I go to school 

Why I love my class so much. 

Remember when every morning .. 

You sat in that chair, I came to you. 

I was stroking your head. 

And said "goodmorning".. You know,, your sleepy face was really cute:) 

Once again. Everything was going well 

Until you told me that.. From the start, you had never leave your ex ... 

Well. Yes. That was hurt. It hurts so bad

I've tried to survive. I've tried to understand you

Then we have to pretend that everything will be fine 

But .... It's too painful 

We're not lovers anymore. Although we still pretty much looks like one

We knew, we still care about each other. 

You even said that I'm still yours. However, I couldn't leave you too 

I've tried to be on your side. Be your best friend (again). 

Because you know.. If you need me, I would never go anywhere

But I think, This is too long
And this is like hurting ourselves
Yes, I do still need your hugs
I do still need our time together
But I can not stand it.
I should walk away, And let you live your own life
Because i'm not your backup plan, or your second option, Dude.

You know,

We should have never need each other this much
We should have never care about each other this much
I should have never want you this bad
And you should have never make any promises
Yup, We should have never fall in love with our bestfriends.

I don't miss you.
I don't miss my boyfriend or either my ex.
But I miss my bestfriend

The worst part is i'm not just losing my boyfriend, But also my bestfriend

I'm not going to try to hold on again. But that does not mean I'm leaving you.
You're the one who let me go, Right?
So i would runaway

Far enough, so you may not notice me

But not far enough, so I may still be able to make sure that you are okay.

Well, If you read this.. Uhm I will say this in Indonesian

Baik-baik ya.. Aku ga bisa jagain kamu lagi, tapi kamu harus janji kamu ga boleh sedih terus

Ga boleh bete2 sendiri, Ga boleh bandel, ga boleh aneh-aneh, kamu harus lakuin yang bikin kamu seneng

Aku tau ga ada ngaruhnya aku ngomong gini, Toh juga nanti ada yang jagain kamu lagi

Seenggaknya sebagai temen.. aku pengen kamu tahu, aku pengen kamu seneng terus.

Maafin aku yang udah jadi beban buat kamu, maafin aku yang sok tau ganggu2 kamu terus

Kapan2 kita main lagi yaaa.. 

Take care dude

Take care my bestfriend

Take care my Drainosaur :) <3

Again and Again

So here i am
Plug in the headset, Sit alone, While having a cup of coffee
Wait.. Where am i? What am i feeling?
It's like i've been here before, But this time it's quite different
Should it be happen again? Should i be the one who step back and watch everything just happens?
Let everyone leave me here. And all i can do is nothing


It's like, such as old wounds are re-felt
But this time, a different kind of wound.
Maybe, it's even more in pain

"Being replaced. I swear, that shit hurts more than a break up"


It feels like yesterday.. When i was hurt and crying all night
Even the wound in my heart hasn't healed yet

I was in the middle of the road.. I was scared
Scared of loving someone, Scared of getting hurt for the same reason
But then i found this guy. I've tried to hold the feelings, But i just can't
Then i tried to give him my broken heart. I just thought he could fix it
Then he took it with him.
First, I was afraid of falling. But then i saw him there
My fears faded
Then i gave my heart and i let myself fall
I believe that he'd catch me there and hold me tight
I was falling, Falling so deep. Deeper and deeper
It's maybe even too deep
Until suddenly he says "No. I can't fix your heart. I have another girl's heart to be kept, and it's more worth it than you" He gave me back my heart. And now, my heart hurts more than before
I can't stop my self from falling.. I kept falling and falling
But he's not there anymore
A guy who i thought would catch me when i fall, Now has walked away and gone.
I kept falling and falling. With no one to catch me.
And it hurts.

My fears become true
I shouldn't have fallen too hard again
If i knew it would only take me in to the same shits again
I would never let my self fall again

Now i know, it was all just an illusion

What else can i do? I've fallen. I've been hurt.
So bad. Too bad

So here i am.

Alone.
But it's okay.
I'm fine
Like always, Huh? :)

:-)

I don't believe if I finally write something like this again
A post that comes not from my mind, but from the heart
A post that not written with tears, but with a smile
Yes .. a post about love

I thought i'll never be in love again
I thought I'll never be able to run from my past
Until at last I found you

I can't even believe if you're the reason I wrote this
Yes, You ..
People who once was just a stranger
People who once was just a friend

And it just happens
At first, I didn't intend to fall to you
But every time I wanted to get back, at that moment I fell and fellback again

I was afraid ..
I'm afraid if this was wrong
I'm afraid if someone will get hurtI'm afraid if i'll lose everything
I tried to get away and fix everyhing

I was keep wondering
I was confused
This is all beautiful, and I don't want to lose it

And again, I tried to back off and get out of all this
I tried to put back everything to exactly like it was
But I can't
Fate and Love said the other
I feel it. You also feel it
We both feel the same, but it just hard to tell
We try to quibble, but we know we both can't deny it

Until finally, in one night
Love said it all
Love explains everything
Love changes everything
Now you got me, I've got you


And..
Yes,
I Love You Ghiz

PHUKET! a glimpse of heaven..

Two Thousand and Eleven!!!! (sounds weird-_-)

HAPPY NEW YEAR PEOPLE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

It's 2011!!! Let's start this year with new spirit and make some good change

 Moment of silence began....

(                                                                 Start Praying....                                                                       )

Whatever your wishes in this year, hopefully will be come true. amin ;)

So, how's your new year eve everybody?

Mine? that was really goooood! I spend the New Year's Eve with my cousins and my brother, we ate a lot of food, we had a 'face painting'.. i became the joker that night! and we played fireworks till midnite! Yeaaah that was so fun, it's been almost 3 years since i've spent my time with those guys :(

Talking about 2010 woogh it was just...............fuuh
It hasn't been a good year for me, it even a toughest year for me.. but still everything that happened in 2010 means so much..

So, actually i just got back from my long-holiday (re: liburan berkepanjangan). I was absent for a week in the first week of school hehe :p
I went to Phuket, Thailand. And that was just soooo soooo amazing! The white sand, the sunshine, the smell of the sea, the waves, the people and the SEAFOOD was just gorgeous!
I think i can say that was a good beginning of 2011, i hope it could be better everyday..

Anyway, i'll tell you about my amazing holiday soon.
Thank you so much for everything 2010, you've been the toughest year ever. But you gave a lot of good lessons, and that what's make me stronger :)
Once again, happy new year all!! Enjoy your 2011!!!!!

:D